I'm starting with the man in the mirror.

I am not even sure where to start with this post. Just to warn you I may ramble, curse or get off track.

Yesterday an old high school friend, and current Facebook "friend" posted something on Facebook that they saw as an appropriate response to this video of a news anchor defending herself to a bully that sent a nasty email in regards to her weight.

 I am not exaggerating when I say that what this "friend" had to say was so completely vile and disgusting that I was literally sweating with rage. Not only was I angry but I was truly disappointed that someone I had known for nearly 20 years and held on high regard could say something so absolutely offensive and asinine.

I am going to share a small expert of this post, that has since been deleted from Facebook, with you so that you can "get the gist" of what this man had to say...


"the caloric intake of a lady who wants to lose weight is only about 200 calories per day in difference. one or two cokes a day and a lady could lose a pound a year for life"
"You want to stay in bed so you can be nice and chubby. In order to stay chubby you commit to NOT exert yourself, NOT run, NOT sweat, NOT work to burn the energy you have taken in. EVER."
"Fat people suck"

This is a very short expert in a 12 paragraph rant. He feels that fat people are offensive, lazy and I guess happy, Being fat? As if fat people only stay fat to offend thin people. He also commented in the 110 comments that followed this post by saying that only women who were, or are "fluffy" seemed to care to defend the news anchor and fat people in general.

 I was fucking MAD when I read this, not for its absurdity, or its offensiveness, but for the fact that there may be even ONE person who could read this and feel bad about themselves.  Because the truth is NO ONE has that right. It is not this man's or any other persons right to judge how someone lives their lives and treats their body. Would someone say such flippant things about a drug addict? An alcoholic, a gay person, a Jew, a Muslim?

The truth is yeah they would. I have overheard so many nasty comments over the years. In fact in my younger years I was pretty hateful myself. Thanks to a few straight forward yet well meaning people I straightened up. I care. Anything that isn't comfortable to a person is fair game. Fat, skinny,  Mentally challenged, transgender. people say terrible things and as much as we wish we could stop them we can't. We just can not do it. A new mean person is born every minute.

So what can we do? WE can keep our heads up. We can confront as many mean people as we can. We can stand up to them like my friend W.T stood to me in high school and began to help me see how much of an asshole I was. (Thanks wit) We can be body positive. We can volunteer. We can offer support. We can be grateful for the things surround us and make us good people.

And most of all we can so the thing that I wasn't completely able to do last night. We absolutely Can Not sink to their level. For every nasty thing they say, we say 2 positive things back. No name calling, no retaliation, no negativity. They may deserve it, but that karma is theirs, not ours. It wont be easy but I myself am going to try. For my son, for my husband, for my fat friends and my skinny friends and my one transgender friend. And most of all for myself. So I can sleep easy every night.


This is my song of the day, its old and its cheesy but I love it and today when I heard it on the radio I really and truly felt it. 

-MB